I wanted very much to forget

22 July Sat

We went to watch movie: Nacho Libre
Been a very long time since we last watch movie together. We met in the afternoon to go cfa together. Cos you have to return 2 guitars, i offered to help u to carry one. We wanted to watch 2 movies. But in the end we have time only for one. After the movie, we ate Ben & Jerry ice-cream. I enjoyed myself that day. You said u enjoy it too. Nice to hear that.

Today, we actually gonna watch "Helen the baby fox". But i dunno why.....i got sad again yesterday. You said we better dun meet, cos i will be sad again. If u can stop telling me how guilty you were, i would have felt less sad. Just stop reminding me of the sad things, please......

And i cry and cry...stupid tears....can't seem to stop. But something came to my mind, if i gonna die tomorrow, I wun want the last thing that i do, is to still be angry with you. If I am going to die, the last thing that i want to do, is to spend time with you, watch movie with you, eat ice-cream with you. Play with Ooki and Sukoshi with you. Ooki and Sukoshi miss you. :(

Back from Japan

9 days went pass. And I am back in Singapore again. It's a great accomplishment as I learnt how to take a plane....ALONE. :S

But i felt sad after i came back. Guess it's not a good feeling to come back to reality. First 3 days of homestay in Tsu city, for no reason we were in the same host. And that freaking slope gave us the chance to hold hands once again. Been really a very long time.......since we last hold hands. Next 3 days of hostel in Kyoto, we watched TV together on the last nite. Why did i sit down when he asked me to.......why did i stay when he ask me to stay? Last 3 days at Fujinomiya, on the last day, we sat together on the buy, playing with Hippie, Miruki, Oki and Scoshi. We were so close then. Then we went 7-eleven......we share pudding and ice-cream....and it seemed back to the past. Later he helped me to bring my luggage down. He was with me all these while.

But......when we were back......i did not forgive him. I felt very very sad, and he is the main cause. Oki is still with him. Is it that i really dun want to see him? I really dunno. I really dun want to talk to him? I dunno.......

Just let me forget everything, i want the past to be erased. PLEASE.......

* 2nd July, da shu and me started. Though unsure, it just happened. Till now, i am still confused. :(