8 years...first time i cried infront of him

It was an ok day for me until the mooncake thing.

A usual practise day. I stayed for the mooncake thing. Had fun playing Chip and Dale with SJ. A pity he left after the games, i wished he could have stayed for the walk.

My mind was peaceful until he came. I just got very sad upon seeing him. My heart sank. And tears started rolling. I wasn't able to control my emotions. I didn't know he was behind me. And i kept wiping away my tears. Until i could stand it no longer. How i wish SJ was there. I left.....crying......and thot of looking for old pal at cfa. He didn't know what happen, but did not turn me away. For the first time, out of the 8 years we known each other, i cried infront of him. Hope i did not scare him. And he ask me a question" Is he really so good?" And this question seemed funny. Of course my immediate answer was "No".

The rest came back cfa before i could cry my hearts out. I can only hid myself inside the toilet. But my eyes were still red. :(

Later, went home....on the way....i called SJ (*knowing SJ has been constantly reading my blog, really wanna thank you. :) Thank you for talking to me and cheering me up. Really appreciate that. *)

在回家的路上，经过了街边一排对我来说从不起眼的树木。一棵大树，在我经过时，悄悄放开了它支撑许久的枯叶。落叶从我面前飘落，让我不自觉地抬头望了望这一棵树。一棵我从来没有察觉到它的存在的树，今天，我看了它一眼。

落叶有如我沮丧的心，一层一层地落到谷底，很深很深的深渊。时间过了这么久，为什么想起他还是会难过？而且是非常非常难过。 ：（ 不是已经告诉了自己要坚强吗？为什么还是做不到？我是不是很失败呢？